Heart Full

In the spirit of tightening my belt after last year’s abysmal economic showing, I decided to reexamine my expenses, one of which was my yoga membership. I was sitting pretty at less than $100/month membership at a studio I LOVED, but looking to get an even better deal.

I had heard from a reliable source that Pure Yoga was actually Equinox undercover. Armed with that knowledge, I decided to take a second look at gym yoga, and maybe take a class? I can hear the sirens already, those two little words and my intention will have me hiding from the yogettes longer than Rushdie.
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I never understood the concept of “Square One”, the saying seems to imply that somehow you’ve ended up in the same place despite your best efforts. But during all of my visits to the proverbial “square one”, I found that I was immensely more knowledgeable the second time around, even if I was faced with a decision that I thought I had already made.

Yet, in spite of all my best efforts and wisdom, I am in fact back at square one, “the 300 hour teacher training” decision. I was sure I was on track to a wonderful new learning experience, from which I would be a newly minted 500 hour RYT, a verifiable Baby Buddha. But then the mixed reviews started to seep in, some from teachers who I deeply respect. “It’s not worth it” they sighed, in clear disappointment, “if you’re expecting to learn as much as you during the 200 hour program, it might be a let down“. I was crushed. On one side, Ishta 300hr program is as close to Kristin’s 300 hr program that I’m going to get to in the near future, and as one yogette pointed out, “you should just find a teacher you dig, and learn under them”. Which would be perfect, except that the teachers I’m finding myself digging either don’t offer 300 hours, see Laughing Lotus , or ask that you runaway to the mountains for a month or two (Jivamukti) and presumably quit your job. Moreover, besides Kristin, I haven’t had a teacher at Ishta who deeply moved me — well there was another, but I technically discovered him at Pure Yoga.
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Long time no write. I’m not going to go through the litany of apologies and “I’m sorry, I was so busy!” Needless to say, there’s been a lot of change in my life, I’m happy to report that all the changes have been positive. I must be one of the few people who can look back on 2008 with all of its economic and political turbulence, and still feel that I was blessed, tremendously. It makes me want to do a yogic offering, right – now, in my living room, barefoot and all!

I have missed my blog tremendously, and the outlet it provides me to just let go and share. So, in the spirit of sharing, I’ve decided to enroll in a 300 hour teacher training program, which will make me, a 500 hour certified teacher, upon completion. It will also make me a lot poorer, which is a heavy consideration. I wasn’t immune to the economic down-turn, that coupled with some very large expenses coming up, such as my wedding, and my soon-to-be husband’s law school, it does give me a very very long pause. The 300 hour certification is even more expensive than the 200 hour, and it’s no doubt even more taxing on time, time that one could argue is better spent on work and the wedding. Am I sure I want to do it? Honestly, about 30% of me doesn’t, and it’s a very strong 30%. It’s also the reasonable 30%, the side of me that I’m use to listening to, because it’s the side that usually right.

I suppose though, that my practice has never been about right, or practical. At some point, I’d rather be doing this for a living than what I do now, so isn’t this actually an investment on my future? Possibly.

I will forwarding my application to the Ishta 300 hour training program, starting up in March. Hopefully, I’ll be accepted. Below, is my essay on why I want to do this, and what kind of teacher I hope to be. At the very least, I hope to be honest.
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New York Yoga

It was love at first drop-in. I had seen the signs in my old UES neighborhood — plastered over what use to be telephone booths but today are advertising stalls. And after months of wondering, and a bad break up, I decided to try it out. My previous yoga experience was at NYSC, and had been brief and painful. After some grueling stretches, the instructor demonstrated “crow” and challenged us to “go for it”. My spirit was willing, but my keyboard trained wrists nearly snapped at the thought. I was sure she was joking. She wasn’t. I didn’t come come back.

But at New York Yoga, I felt welcomed the minute I crept through the door. The receptionist (Melissa) greeted me with a warm smiled, that felt sincere. The instructor (Molly) wasn’t the fitness instructor I was expecting. She was more like a friend, who understood. I came back the next day, and the day after, I was hooked. At first, it was the movement that captured my imagination, but as my practice developed, I found myself returning for the wisdom and the community.
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