Heart Full – Shine the light

Posted by chai on November 8th, 2009 in reviews, yoga

A couple days ago I wrote about the Shala calling its classes good but “not that challenging”. That may have been a pre-mature assessment given I hadn’t had Kelly Morris’ class. Apparently her classes were so good, she could summon the winds of changed opinions with one namaste. True story.

Forces conspired against me to make it to her class, between last minute changes at work and subway delays I knew I was going to just make it. My heart sank as I saw the line to get in was creeping down the stairs and I was the last one on it. A few more trickled in after, but that was of little comfort as seemingly everyone in line behind me had a friend who was already signed (or in line ahead of me). They silently slinked up the line ahead of me (though we all knew they just arrived), and whispered to their friend, who made room for them. Others circumvented us in more indirect methods, they got their already signed in friends to “put down” a mat for them, or sometimes the friends themselves offered to find them a spot and they accepted. I wondered what had happened to their basic manners, a line is there for a reason and you can choose to disrespect those reasons, but don’t pretend like it’s OK just because your friend says so.

By the time I did manage to get into class it was all I could think about. Yogis who noisily leave during svasana, who leave their cell phones on during svasana, who drip sweat onto your mat (when they could just re-angle themselves) because they just need the to get into Astavrakasana at that moment. The noise in my mind escalated to a deafening crescendo. And then she spoke. She commanded silence, and without resistance we gave it.

And just like that, my mind quieted and the noise dissipated.  The yogi next to me smiled and offered me her blanket during sukasana. I found freedom in my practice and with that freedom came asanas that had previously eluded me. The way she delivered her instructions it was as if getting into the poses was a foregone conclusion, she believed you could do it and just like that, I could.

I thought it had all been her, she was just that good. And yes she played no small part. But it wasn’t the delivery, adjustments (which btw were profound), it was the freedom that her instructions guided me towards. When I could finally let go of all my expectations, and judgements (e.g. other people’s manners), or my own capabilities, all that remained was my breath. And just as Kristin and Mia promised it took me to the next level.